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An email

 

 

Jake Mooney

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Re: The till keeps getting stuck...

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Dear Jake, Yes it does that. Give it a kick it will sort itself out.

So are you two married yet? Have you even asked Madeleine yet? Me and your dad aren't getting younger you know we're still waiting to see you two wed. Your dad says it's not right having the shop owners living in sin.

I think he was just being all catholic again to be honest.

I'm serious though. You and Madeleine are perfect for each other. Yes I know what I said when you two first get together and while I do still think you're a silly Irish sod you make Madeleine happy and that's all me and Margaret care about to be honest. Mind you I am impressed to hear that the shop's not gone out of business or burned down or exploded or anything so that's good.

I'll be honest I didn't really think you'd be able to hack it but you proved me wrong. Madeleine says you still haven't grown up but the people like you and that's all that matters. As long as they keep giving you money which is kind of why we do it to be honest then it's all good even if you are still a bloody child. You're a good kid but you're still a kid even if you are nearly thirty.

Madeleine told me once that you're not like that all the time. She said you're a born leader but I can't say I've ever seen that to be honest. Still you're a good lad and Madeleine could do a lot worse. I remember that Chris who used to live in Brakenthorpe. Is he still there? He was not a nice man anyway. But you you're alright and I reckon you'll make a good husband now you've got a taste of responsibility.

If you grow up of course which to be honest you won't but we live in hope eh?

Anyway I'd better sign off Margaret's looking at me with that look that says I'm going to get in trouble if I don't get off the laptop and open the bar. Because you me you're going to need that sense of joy of yours because Madeleine takes after her mum.

Speaking of the bar you two are coming to see us in Tenerife next time you have a holiday. Get that John to look after the shop he's trustworthy. There shall be reasonably priced drinks waiting for you!

Bye for now, Bob Wilder (your future father in law)

P.S. Your dad says hello. Your mum didn't say anything because she buggered off to Dublin. You're better off without her.